Everything BUTT… (Yes, I’m talking about anal sex)

Sometimes I come across a blog post so brilliant, I have to share it and today it happened to me again. Life of a Lover Girl posted I’m anal about anal but(t) and I found myself empathising with every word she said.

Anal is something I’m not all that into. With The Guy I Couldn’t Get Rid Of, I made it a feature too early on in the relationship so it was the be-all and end-all of our sex life towards the end. He wasn’t small in the trouser department either so I’m sure you can all feel my pain. I haven’t done anal sex with Jock at all. Nor am I planning to yet. I don’t think he’s that bothered about it thankfully. It’s been mentioned a few times and one day, I do plan on letting him enter my chocolate starfish, so to speak, but for now, it can remain and exit and not an entrance!

Just like Life of a Lover Girl, I found myself going through a nasty and painful experience the every first time I had anal sex. It was with Number 2 on my list, and I’m sure I speak about the experience in a previous blog post but I’ll fill you in on the basics.

I’m 16 years old. He’s a year older. We have been dating for a few months, perhaps 6? We were only together for about a year so it must have been about halfway through. We were at a house party and had drank far more than we should have done. We were in a bedroom and there was a bed in the corner. I ended up facing the corner (the bed was in the corner of the room) with nowhere to go. He rammed his cock up my ass, bone dry and without any warning. Just like Life of a Lover Girl, I freaked out beyond belief. I cried. I felt sick. I’m pretty sure I vomited in the toilet a while later. It hurt. It hurt more than I could ever tell you. It’s been 11 years and I can still feel that pain – that tearing sensation as something enters your sphincter for the first time. It’s a very unpleasant experience. It was also a very scary one. I was in the corner so I literally had nowhere to go. I was also drunk and not in control of myself as I normally would. And, if that shit hurt when I was THAT drank, just imagine how much pain it would have caused had I been sober.

I was put off by the very thought of anal sex for a long time after that. I tried it a couple of times with the boyfriend I had after Number 20 (who I later also cheated on with Number 20) – Number 4 (aka The Fireman) This guy had an enormous cock and we didn’t have full penetration that often, so anal sex was definitely, one hundred percent off the menu.

Anal SexI think we may have tried it once or twice while incredibly drunk. In fact, I’d go as far as to say that he tried to put it in my ass when we were drunk in a bar toilet. I think I was cheating on The Big Love at the time. Fuck, I had forgotten about that. We were in the bar with a couple that he knew. I had gone to the bathroom, realised how drunk I was and saw my opportunity. There has always been this sexual tension between us and we always end up sleeping together when we meet up for that “quiet drink”. While in the bar toilet, I pulled my panties off and shoved them in my pocket. He was a kinky little fucker when we were together so I knew it would rock his world. I went back to the table and as the other couple got up to buy a round of drinks, I placed my panties in his hand. The look in his eyes was priceless and one I will never forget. We didn’t manage anal sex, of course, and we didn’t while we were still in a relationship. He was massive so that would never have ended well.

The Lapdog put it in my ass a few times but we were normally high on MDMA and wouldn’t have felt any pain whatever we did. I remember it feeling nice but that could just have been the drugs.

I clearly had anal sex with the Hubby. How could I not – we were married. It wasn’t something we did all the time but every now and again, I let him do it. I also got quite into it with Big Love. We used toys and fingers and other things, normally when we were high on coke, but occasionally when we were sober too. I enjoyed anal sex with Big Love but only because I got something out of it too.

I’m odd when it comes to anal sex and I”m glad that Life of a Lover Girl decided to come out and talk about it. I’ve broached the topic of anal before in the post Anal Sex – What’s the Deal? but people don’t talk about it enough, I feel.

I do enjoy anal sex sometimes but I need to be entirely comfortable when it happens. I like it to be planned but not planned, if that makes any sense. For example, we’ve not seen each other in a few weeks and it’s going to be a naughty night in. I won’t go as far as to use an enema but I will make sure that I am super clean. I don’t do a number two that often and I’m very funny with my “bottom happenings” so I don’t really enjoy something going in there if I know there is likely to be something it might bump into.

A few drinks will definitely help. As will a sensual massage and some proper foreplay beforehand. Plenty of lubrication – just let your fingers slide and we’ll go with the flow. I’ll let you know when to stop, don’t worry. Sometimes I won’t even want to stop – that’s the game you’re playing here. It’s when I want it now, not when some 17 year old little shit decides to ram it in my ass without any warning or lubricant. With the right person and in the right situation, anal sex can be very nice indeed.

Anyway, thanks Life of a Lover Girl for a super brilliant post. Why aren’t more people talking about it?! 😉

 

3 thoughts on “Everything BUTT… (Yes, I’m talking about anal sex)

  1. Good question and thank you!! ;):) At least you were able to enjoy it some of the time, lol. Im in more pain today than I would have thought, considering he only got it partway in yesterday. Maybe I would have done better if I had a little more to drink beforehand too. I took one sip of a Mike’s lemonade before setting it down and starting on the fucking. 😉

    Having it rammed in there dry is awful and I am guessing that happens more often than not when we are young and the guys don’t know any better. It probably makes for a lot of women that are afraid of anal though.

    The guy yesterday, at least he was trying to do things right and get me relaxed and warmed up. I told him today that the ass to pussy bothered me and he said he was sorry he knew he shouldn’t have done that but he was about to cum and couldn’t finish himself in my ass due to it hurting me too much. 😛 He said he wont do it again.

    Men always seem to be claiming that they knew some woman or other who just loved it. My fuck buddy has a very thick, 9 inch cock and he says his ex wife loved to ride anal cowgirl. Yeowww…

    • Firstly, at least he didn’t finish off in your ass. That’s happened to me. It’s not attractive. Secondly, no way is a 9 inch cock coming anywhere near my ass!! Thirdly, more booze defo necessary Hahaha!

  2. Pingback: What’s The Best Sex You Ever Had? | Not So Sex in the City!

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