He Makes Me Smushy.

So he fell asleep on me, blew me out and then I blew him out. Now he’s pining for me like a lost puppy dog and I think I’ve pretty much made my point. I’m thinking about it like puppy dog clicker training – every time he blows me out, I’m going to blow him out right back. He hates it when I do so eventually he should just stop blowing me out.

That works. Right?

It’s been such a long time since I last see Jock. It’s been a week so far, and we still have another 4/5 sleeps to go. Ugh. I really miss him. He makes me go all smushy.

He told me something the other day that made my heart melt. His exact words were:

“Every Prince has his Princess. Just a case of never giving up and always believing she’s out there. I think I found mine”

Doesn’t he just make your heart melt? Doesn’t it make your insides go mushy and your knees go weak? It certainly does with me. He seems to have this amazing knack of getting himself out of the shit whenever I’m mad at him – it’s as if he knows. I honestly don’t know how he’s doing it.

I’m his Princess? Really? That’s me? I’m his “one” if such a “one” should exist? That’s pretty big words to say after just three months of knowing someone. He either falls in love real easy and real quick, or he’s definitely certain I’m the “one” for him.

Holy crap, those are some pretty big shoes to fill.

We still haven’t actually said the L-word to each other yet. He sort of told me that he thinks he “rawr’s” me, but we haven’t yet exchanged those three magical little words. I feel it. Or at least I’m pretty sure I do, but I don’t think I’m ready to say it yet. I actually thought he would have said it to me by now and I would just have reacted as I felt at the time. Why shouldn’t I just “wing” it? Everything else between us has been “winging” it and that seems to have worked for us quite well.

I’m pretty sure if and when he EVER just says it, I’ll say it right back. I can just imagine it being this perfect moment between us and I will feel so in the moment that it’ll slide out. That’s what I have in my head anyway. I’m hoping it pans out just like that. I’m definitely missing him a lot more than I thought I would. I almost feel bad for blowing him out but I needed to make my point. I guess I made more than one.

I can’t wait to see him again. Just a few more sleeps to go. We haven’t made definite plans as yet – he’s under the impression I’m going to have to work some of the days but we are unsure of what days. I have the whole weekend off but he doesn’t need to know that. I’m not sure if I’m ready for entire-weekend sleepovers just yet.

For now I will continue to pine for him. Can you hear me sighing from there? What the hell has happened to me?

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