After a conversation at work today, I realised the men in my life were a mess, and more than a little confusing. For my own benefit, as well as to keep you in the loop, I have decided to get the update down in black and white.
There’s a few men in my life right now. There always is.
There’s My Mr. Grey. I haven’t really been paying him a lot of attention these days. I don’t have the patience to deal with him while he figures out what he really wants. I adore him, I tell him I love him on an almost daily basis. He can work out what he wants and then let me know. It’s funny though, my mind has been consumed with One Ball recently, so I haven’t really texted My Mr. Grey, but it seems to have kicked him into touch. He invited me to a wedding at the end of this month that I simply cannot afford to fly to the other end of the country for, so instead, he has been constantly texting me and has decided he is going to try and come to my end of the country instead. Apparently he misses me so much, he just cannot keep away.
Then there is One Ball. We were meant to have had our second date tonight but I cancelled. It’s heading towards the end of the month, and my funds are running low. On top of that, I can’t really invite him back to mine. I live with family again after leaving my Big Love with absolutely nothing. My family is a messy bunch, and to be fair, the state of my crib embarrasses me, and I don’t have the time or the inclination to keep cleaning up after everyone. The thing is, One Ball is in the same boat – he has recently left his missus and has practically nothing himself. I could easily invite him over to mine, but to be fair, I quite like him and I don’t want to hand it over on a plate; something that would easily happen if he proves to be as good of a kisser as he already is in my head. You know when you just look at someone’s lips and you just KNOW they are going to kiss like a pro; that’s how I feel when I look at him.
One Ball gave me his list of what he wants from a woman, and although I don’t want to blow my own trumpet, I reckon I have pretty much all of them. He wants a girl that is strong willed, independent, funny and dirty/kinky. I tick all of those boxes, right? His favourite celebrity that he would like to date is Pink. This makes me happy. I’m bleach blonde, pierced and tattooed, and have my own unique take on the punk look, especially with my ever changing coloured hair. Currently, I have white blonde hair with blue dipped ends. Very Pink!
I guess in conclusion, I’m still kinda smitten by this guy and I cannot wait for our next date. I almost wish I hadn’t cancelled. He is seeing his kids this weekend, and I probably won’t get a chance to see him now until Monday. It’s Thursday right now. That seems like such a long time away!
The Guy I couldn’t get rid of it – after the “Please don’t text me again, ever!” text message, I had a couple of apologising text messages, and a call from a withheld number that I assume was him. That’s it for now. I kinda miss him. I miss talking to him. There is no chance I would ever forgive him for what he did, what he said to me, and how he made me feel however. I have secretly unblocked him on one of my phones in the hope that he might get in touch but it hasn’t happened yet. I guess he’s still fucking his way through the dating website, one girl at a time. Asshole.
The lapdog. I haven’t heard much from him recently. His girlfriend tried to add me on Facebook, and he called me at 4 in the morning, but since then, nothing at all. Maybe he has finally got the hint? I do think about him from time to time, but not enough for me to ever want to contact him again. I’m done with all that crazy!
The Big Love. I messaged him on Facebook recently to see if he would send me something home. It took a joint, a lot of re-writing and a big deep breath to send it, but I did. That was yesterday, and I have heard nothing yet. I guess he’s over it then. Huff and puff. I’m not going into another Big Love rant. Does this mean I’m on my way to being over it?
So there you have it. I don’t think I’ve missed any of them out. It doesn’t look so confusing now, but I do need to remember that the exes are exes for a reason, and if they are trying to contact me, I should just find more ways to avoid them! Heartache is a matter of choice. You either let them get you down or you don’t; it’s as simple as that!